“Honey Don’t,” Ethan Coen’s latest “mystery,” is exactly what Focus Features should have said to Coen when he pitched his raunchy lesbian detective story.
The Coen brothers, Joel and Ethan, have written, directed and edited some of contemporary cinema’s greatest works. “The Big Lebowski,” “Fargo” and “No Country for Old Men” are some of the best examples of what good directing looks like. Each of these films have a recognizable tone and style, consistent cinematography and color scheme, and the characters have distinct mannerisms. “Honey Don’t” falls flat in all of these aspects.
After 2018’s “The Ballad of Buster Scruggs” the brothers decided to part ways as directors.
“Honey Don’t” is the second film Ethan directed alone and it shows just how important his brother’s influence is on his work. Written with his wife, Tricia Cooke, “Honey” is a complete and utter trainwreck.
Coen and Cooke craft two parallel storylines. One follows an evil small town church pastor (Chris Evans) as he commits heresies and crimes, and controls vulnerable women. Another more intriguing storyline follows lesbian private eye Honey O'Donahue (Margaret Qualley) as she investigates her niece’s disappearance and starts a relationship (of sorts) with detective M.G. Falcone (Aubrey Plaza).
The two storylines start off interesting, with the characters offering the typical Coen charisma. Around the midpoint, once Honey’s niece disappears, everything goes off the rails. From what could have been believable and grounded in reality exponentially shifts to a fantasy world where the consequences for characters are irrelevant and the plot only moves forward because it has to. The characters no longer feel genuine, and you start to notice more and more how bereft of emotion the film is.
Worst of all, the storylines never intersect in a way which feels good. The tone of “Honey Don’t” is similar to other successful Coen movies — its flaws are from how it chooses to tell the story. The “show don’t tell” technique is completely abandoned, with overt messages that hit the viewer less hard than if they were more subtle.
“Honey Don’t” glorifies sex through its lackluster lesbian sex scenes and outrageously boring orgy scenes. Nudity is frequent and serves little to no purpose. The movie really just feels like Ethan Coen thought to himself, “Let’s get a bunch of famous actors naked and pretend there’s a story here.” The only difference between “Honey Don’t” and porn is the story and the story in “Honey Don’t” is so bland and incomplete it feels like you were watching porn and didn’t finish.
While the lesbian relationship between Plaza and Qualley makes sense within the film’s world, the sudden “twist” within their relationship leaves an indifferent taste in your tongue. The few fights and deaths which occur don’t feel earned. The acting is so unbelievably stale and one-dimensional you can’t help but wonder how these incredible actors play such amazing characters in other films.
The only thing “Honey Don’t” benefits from is its consistent pacing and tone. Even then, the end feels rushed and leaves you thinking there’s more movie that Coen and Cooke didn’t add. The entire third act feels incomplete, like there’s a story left out which would have made the rest of the film worthwhile.
All in all, I would have been better off if I didn’t see “Honey Don’t.” My life was better and my wallet more full before I chose to see this movie in theaters. Best to wait till it’s on streaming. The big screen adds nothing to this dreadful film.
2 out of 5 stars
“Honey Don’t”
Dir. Ethan Coen
1hr 29 min/89 minutes